Don’t do New year resolutions!!! You don’t need a new year to make a change. Each day is a blank page, each hour or each breathe. If anyone hasn’t told you lately. Accept who you are. You’re deliciously you, you are good, you are perfect and you are enough.
I do truly honour and love myself, but I’ve wanted to get fit for sometime. There was a brief moment in time in my twenties and thirties I ran, went to the gym but I was still searching and ultimately not feeling satisfied with my results. What I did continue a regular practice of Pilates and then later Yoga. Adopting a weekly practice to “help” maintain my back was acceptable and manageable to me.
I now enter into a different area of my life where I’m ready to embrace change and challenge myself further. I’ve never been a fan of sweating or taking out my dangly earings for exercise, but I’m willing to compromise.
Due to much research I now am armed with the knowledge that strengthening and maintaining 3 key areas of our life creates a firm foundation for a happy life.
I know I have to maintain close relationships to assist my mental health. Connection is key, but did you know most of us spend 90% of our energy trying to fix or heal relationships with people we find difficult due to the fear of rejection or change and only 10% in the close “easy” relationships. When we flip that, lavish attention and love to the ones closest and acknowledge the difficulties with the challenging people in our lives, but only give it a small part of attention, we can breath easier and become happier.
Financial wealth is another area that requires attention and maintenance in order to feel full filled and reduce our stress, Since reading the Barefoot investor book by Scott Pape and maintaining the exercises and planning for the far, near and present, life in our house has become much more harmonious. There are further steps with clearing blockages and manifesting wealth that I’ve adopted too. Scott’s no nonsense and above anything, easy to follow steps help people to gain control of their financial situation. You don’t gain the control when you pay off all your debts, the moment you gain it is when you take the blinkers off, live within your means and “own that shit”, as Harley Quinn on Suicide squad says.
Physical health is also one of the three key strong legs. I eat well most of the time, I walk everyday and do yoga, but I also have a like and want for salt and vinegar chips (even writing it makes my mouth water) and wine. As life is in most part about balance, delayed gratification and thoughtful decisions we have to plot our way through.
So the decision was made on Monday 30th December 2019, I would do 30 minutes of exercise every day. In order to come to these decisions, we as humans need a few things to cement the idea in our minds. No human likes to be controlled, but we like to feel in control. To implement a new routine, we need a reason, a method and proof.
Throughout my life I’ve got lots of evidence that putting effort in ideas, doesn’t always bear the fruit I expected. I remember as a child I spent ages decorating a boiled egg for the primary school Easter competition. A beautiful brown chicken was born, with painted strips of paper for feathers and beak and cute little eyes. I proudly presented her in front of the whole school assembly, feeling sure I’d win. I’d put hours of effort in after all, so it was impossible to conceive the idea that I wouldn’t. But that wasn’t the case. A boy I really liked laughed and said it was stupid, as he showed his ET egg (all the rage as the film was just released). Everyone adored his effort and he got lots of votes to win. I was devastated, how come my efforts weren’t rewarded or at least recognised by my peers. When my Mum picked me up, she asked how it went and I could no longer hold it together and I don’t even think I brought my egg home. My pride was hurt and I vowed not to put too much effort into things, as I won’t succeed so my creativeness was halted, even though I enjoyed art and crafts. Instead I could have risen up and vowed to do better, create more amazing ideas and keep going. But I didn’t have the skills and people around me didn’t either to allow me to reflect on what happened and flip it to a learning and growing experience, instead of a waste of time and embarrassing one.
I’ve digressed from my reason, with the excuses I play in my head, of why not to exert effort, as the results could be painful. Well when we let go of the end result and trust the process, we can allow enjoyment and fun, so we’re more likely to carry on. My reason for committing to exercise is to feel my body moving, to enjoy breathing while I stretch or lift weights and enjoy feeling stronger. My reason isn’t to look like Elle McPhearson, I don’t want her body, I want mine. I can admire wonderful examples of our species, but I don’t want to be them, I want to be the best version of me, but enjoy it and not be destination driven. So the method I’ve decided on is 30 minutes per day of physical activity, starting with yoga stretches, hand and machine weights, resistance and building upto running.
My proof is built on research of reading, talking to people and ultimately knowing that 30 minutes is acceptable and maintainable to me. My friend has recently lost weight and changed her body shape by eating sensible portions and exercising 30 minutes per day. So that was the final proof that it works. By sharing this with my family and you, I’m keeping myself accountable. I welcome anyone asking me, how’s it going? I also welcome any comments on how amazing I look (well you gotta hope) and how much brighter and positive the changes are in me.
If you have a goal and need help clarifying your Reason, Method and Proof. please reach out and we’ll plot it out and make sense of it together. If you need an accountability buddy, I’m here too or can line you up with one.
There’s a saying my yoga teacher saying “Where effort and ease meet”. Take the effort up to where it meets ease. Listen to your body, it has a story and being present with it, will improve how you feel.
I was later dancing in the kitchen much to youngest teenager’s mirth. I could feel the tightness in my back and the odd twinge, but because I was enjoying myself, I could notice them, feel them and then move through them to let them go, so they didn’t bother me anymore. Push past your resistance, venture to the other side.
Know your worth, find your peace.
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